‘I made Sands’ Christmas film about baby loss – I hope people feel comfort’

Every year, the beginning of the festive period is often marked by the release of Christmas adverts, with retailers including John Lewis and Waitrose competing to be named the ‘best’.

However, putting aside companies attempting to sell festive products to their customers, the most impactful adverts are often the ones that spread a powerful and relatable message.

This year, the baby loss charity Sands has released a film titled ‘I’ll never forget you’ in the hope that people who have experienced pregnancy or baby loss will be reminded that they’re not alone.

Metro spoke to the director of the film, Phil Beastall, who went viral in 2018 for his Christmas advert The Long Gift, which people described as being ‘better than John Lewis’ at the time.

Having previously collaborated with Sands on a 2023 Lewis Capaldi music video for his song Pointless, Phil explained that he wanted to ‘show that process from one Christmas to another’.

‘I hope that people who are experiencing a loss will be able to reflect that they’re not alone. There is support out there for them. I hope that in that horrible moment, they might feel some comfort to know that they’re not isolated with that situation. There’s a real strong community aspect to this film to hopefully bring people together in a difficult time,’ he said.

Metro also talked to Carolyn Bray, the assistant director of income and supporter engagement at Sands.

‘We wanted to try and give an insight into, particularly Christmas, this time of year, which is probably extra challenging for families, given that [it] focuses on family, and so any loss at Christmas is heightened,’ she shared. ‘Trying to show a lifelong experience in a couple of minutes is a challenge in itself. People might be able to relate to and understand what it might be like for a bereaved parent over this time of year.’

The film, ‘I’ll never forget you’, opens with a couple coming home on Christmas after suffering the heartbreaking loss of their baby, a harrowing scene that takes place with no music playing in the background.

After entering the front door and looking at the Christmas tree in the corner of the living room, the woman, played by Joelle Desiree, collapses to the ground in tears.

‘I wanted the audience to feel exactly what the couple were feeling.’

Her partner, played by George Kreitem, kneels on the ground in front of her, embracing her tightly while his eyes also well up with tears.

The camera then pans to the empty baby carrier that’s been placed on the ground, and the stocking for their daughter, who they named Julia May, that’s hanging above the fireplace.

While grieving together at home, the man starts doing research into the work that Sands does. They eventually meet up with another couple by a tree, where people have placed ornaments on a tree with the names of the babies who they’ve sadly lost.

As time passes, they find joy by spending time with the other bereaved parents, with the woman laughing while doing yoga at home with her friend, and the man joining the Sands United football team, which was featured in the 2023 Lewis Capaldi video.

After finding a babygro at home that was adorned with Julia May’s name, later on while walking in the park with her partner, the woman stops for a moment when she sees a mother and daughter playing on the swings.

One evening, her partner presents her with a beautiful memory box full of items for Julia May, including the babygro and a butterfly necklace.

‘Baby loss is still such a taboo. People still don’t like talking about it.’

The film ends with a scene from the following Christmas, when the pair are joined by two other couples at their home for their festive meal. As they hold hands under the table and smile at one another, Cam Monroe’s song, also titled I’ll Never Forget You, comes to an end.

While the song plays throughout the film, director Phil made a conscious choice for the first scene to have no background music.

‘I wanted the audience to feel exactly what the couple were feeling,’ he explained. ‘I pictured that this was the first time they’ve come home, and I imagine that for the whole journey home, they haven’t said a single word.

‘In that moment that they step through the door, that’s when it truly hits them that everything that they had imagined didn’t happen, and they came home without their baby. I didn’t want to glamourise that moment, because it’s not glamorous at all.

‘I wanted their performance to be the only thing that we experience. I wanted it to be as hard-hitting as possible, and to help people feel it as much as possible with the characters.’

Phil, who has a full-time job and didn’t make any money from working on the Sands campaign, stressed that despite the sadness of the story, he wanted to ensure that it also highlighted a feeling of hope as well.

‘Too many people don’t get the support that they might need.’

‘Every film I make, it always has an ending of hope. I think I’m trying to draw attention to this idea that even in those difficult times, there’s still hope and it’s just about finding it,’ he outlined.

‘I didn’t make money from it. That’s not what it was about. I said to them that I will do it for the least amount possible so that we can have the biggest impact possible.

‘It’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make. I love the process. It was hard work, but I never felt stressed with the process. I knew it was for such a good purpose.’

Carolyn praised Phil for the way in which he’s able to ‘portray grief in a sensitive way’, in both this new Sands film and his previous work.

‘This is literally a snapshot, but I think it’s been created so powerfully and sensitively, and it feels really authentic. I was watching it going, I don’t think you can tell whether they’re actors or they’ve got personal experience, because they’ve done such a cracking job,’ she said.

Opening up about the ‘taboo’ that surrounds discussions about baby loss, she continued: ‘It’s still such a taboo. People still don’t like talking about it. It’s uncomfortable. People don’t know what to say. Hopefully, this might open the conversation.

‘I’m bereaved myself. So I’m incredibly proud of this piece, and can’t wait to share it. I can, in a way, just remind people that this is still my world. It doesn’t change.

‘Too many people don’t get the support that they might need because they might not know it exists, or they might be further down the line, and think it’s only for people early on in their bereavement journey, which is not the case at all. I hope that it gets everybody talking about baby loss. It’s really hard, but not enough people are talking about it.’