Something I’ve always admired about Jennifer Lopez is that she’s never going to let the dust settle. She’s always going to move on and keep busy. Her love life can be a total disaster, but she’s still going to turn up to that premiere, and film her next movie the following day. These photos are of Jennifer filming The Last Mrs. Parrish in New York this month. She’s filming at the same time she’s promoting Kiss of the Spider Woman in the city. Last week, she appeared on Watch What Happens Live (for some reason she loves stopping by that show), and she answered questions about her best on-screen kiss (she named Brett Goldstein) and whether Alex Rodriguez cheated on her with a Southern Charm star (she basically said no comment). But the best interviewer is always going to be Howard Stern, and Jennifer really opened up about what went wrong in her relationships and marriages:
Has Jennifer Lopez experienced true love yet? The Kiss of the Spider Woman actress made her first visit to SiriusXM’s Howard Stern Show on Wednesday, Oct. 15, and during a wide-ranging conversation, Lopez spoke about love and relationships.
“Do you think you’ve truly been loved?” Stern, 71, asked Lopez, 56. After a pause, she replied, “No,” adding that she has, though, experienced truly loving someone else.
“What I learned, it’s not that I’m not lovable — it’s that they’re not capable. … They don’t have it in them,” she said, adding, “And they gave me what they had. They gave me all of it, every time. All the rings, all the things I could ever want. The houses, the rings, the marriage. All of it. But….”
Part of the issue was, she admitted, “I didn’t love myself” at the time.
“When I got divorced this last time, it was the best thing that ever happened to me. Because it really made me journey into— I mean, I had a religious coach, I had a therapist, a couple’s therapist, an individual therapist, I had a coach to understand addiction. I had everything. I was like, ‘I’m gonna f—in’ figure this s— out if it kills me.’ ”
She came to the understanding that the “core of the thing is you — it’s nobody else. Now I’m able to sit here in a much more self-assured, self-aware way of the things that have happened to me, whether my mother, my father, in my own life, how I learned to love, how I felt neglected — all the things that are in your head as a person — and know who I am and just really appreciate that person,” she explained. “[I] feel really comfortable and good in being myself, all the good parts and all the kind of complicated things.”
Stern asked, “But you haven’t had that with someone?” Lopez replied, “Glimpses.” He then told her, “I wish that for you,” to which she thanked him.
“What I learned, it’s not that I’m not lovable — it’s that they’re not capable. … They don’t have it in them…” I think this is true specifically for Jennifer and her men, and it’s true of many men (but not all). Of course, I also think that some women have “successful” relationships because they meet men where they are emotionally, they accept men’s love incapabilities, understanding that it’s not about them. Men, like women, have their own love languages. But yeah, specifically about Jennifer’s relationships and marriages, I think the guys were the problem, but as she admits, she didn’t really know herself.
Additionally, in this Stern interview, Jennifer spoke about her one big professional regret: turning down the lead in Adrian Lyne’s Unfaithful, a role which went to Diane Lane (and Lane got Oscar-nominated for it too). J.Lo told Stern: “Adrian Lyne offered me Unfaithful… The script wasn’t good,” but Jennifer complimented Lyne and said he “made it great.” Jennifer said that turning it down “haunts me. It haunts me a little bit. It’s like the one that I turned down that it was just like, ‘Why did you turn down working with Adrian Lyne? What were you thinking?’ I didn’t even know what the hell was going on in my mind at the time. Who knows what was going on with me at the time.”
Photos courtesy of Cover Images, Backgrid.
