A Massachusetts mother who killed her three young children with exercise bands before attempting to take her own life was ‘desperate for a break’ according to entries written in her journal before the killings.
Lindsay Clancy, 36, has pleaded not guilty to three counts of first-degree murder over the deaths of Cora, five, Dawson, three, and eight-month-old Callan.
While Lindsay’s defence team do not deny that she killed her children, they say she wasn’t criminally responsible because she was experiencing extreme postpartum psychosis, a rare mental illness that causes hallucinations, delusions and extreme mood swings.
After strangling her children, she reportedly cut her wrists and neck and fell 20ft from a window onto frozen ground, suffering spinal injuries which left her paralysed and using a wheelchair.
As the trial continues, journal entries written by Lindsay two months before she killed the youngsters have come to light.
The entries reveal that she had ‘horrible insomnia and anxiety’, as well as being wracked with guilt over her decision to stop breastfeeding her eight-month-old son and sleep train him.
A journal entry from November 18, 2022, reads: ‘It’s like I’m so desperate to get a mental break from taking care of everyone that my mind is trying to make something physically wrong with me.
‘I want help. I want to be well.’
Earlier, jurors heard evidence from psychiatrists who saw Lindsay while she was in Brigham and Women’s Hospital in Boston, where she spent a month after her suicide attempt.
Those who saw her testified that she co-operated with them, and did not appear to be suffering from suicidal or homicidal thoughts.
Forensic psychiatrist Jhilam Biswas saw her just before she was due to undergo back surgery on January 26, 2023, when she was sedated and fitting with a breathing tube.
When he asked her how she was feeling she wrote: ‘Horrified,’ while adding: ‘Is my back broken? Are my legs straight?’
Prosecutor Jennifer Sprague questioned Biswas over Clancy asking if she had an attorney during their meeting, and that no signs of psychosis were noted.
However her lawyer, Kevin Reddington, asked Biswas to confirm she had only seen her once, shortly before she underwent the operation, and whether appearing normal while suffering psychosis is possible.
‘For some people, they can have moments of clarity, absolutely,’ Biswas said. ‘And for some, it can be more continuous. It really depends on the patient and their illness.’
Another psychiatrist, Sejal Shah, reported seeing Lindsay several times over the course of a month, and said she did not display suicidal or homicidal thoughts, and had been ‘looking forward’ to being moved to a rehab facility.
Prosecutors in the case say the former labour and delivery nurse acted intentionally and is criminally responsible for the deaths.
Testimony delivered in the trial last week saw jurors told of the harrowing 911 call made by Lindsay’s husband Patrick on January 24, 2023, the day that the children were killed.
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They were told that two police officers had arrived at the scene and had been attending to Lindsay, who had jumped from the second floor window of the family home, but then raced to the basement of the property after her husband Patrick was heard screaming.
He had been out of the house running an errand when the incident occurred, and returned to find his wife injured before discovering his children in the basement.
Officers Stephen Hall and Brian Josephine testified that they were dispatched separately to the house in Duxbury, finding Patrick calling for help from behind the property.
Josephine claimed that they heard Patrick’s screams in the basement and found Cora and Dawson dead, while Callan had a faint pulse. Callan was airlifted to hospital, where he died several days later.
Patrick testified last week that when he found Lindsay injured, she had told him that their children were in the basement, but did not tell him they were dead.
Lindsay claims that a voice told her, ‘This is your last chance. Kill the children so you can kill yourself,’ according to her lawyer.
Her husband said his wife’s mental health deteriorated leading up to the killings, and that Lindsay had suffered from thoughts of suicide as well as intrusive thoughts of harming their children.
She was put on several medications and sought help from postpartum mental health specialists before spending time in a psychiatric hospital. She was discharged from their care 19 days before she killed her children.
On that day, Patrick had gone out to collect medicine and a takeaway after Lindsay said she had had an exhausting day, and returned home less than an hour later to find blood on the bedroom floor, a bloody knife on a bedside table, and an open window.
He then found his wife outside, barely conscious, before discovering what had happened to their children.
Patrick publicly forgave Lindsay for what she had done, releasing a statement shortly after the deaths of his children: ‘The real Lindsay was generously loving and caring.
‘All I wish for her now is that she can somehow find peace.’
The trial continues.