This week’s theme is based on a card I received for my birthday several months ago. It was from my fitness coach with whom I meet twice a week. Yes, it’s to keep me strong, flexible, and “balanced.” The humorous birthday card read, “The secret to staying young is diet and exercise. No wonder it’s a secret. And that secret sucks.” And then he wrote, “I appreciate the hard work and your dedication over all these years. So happy with all you achieved in the past year and excited to see what you do next.”
That may sound like a usual birthday greeting. For me, it was not. What got me was the last phrase, “excited to see what you do next.” I said to my coach, “Do you realize what you wrote?” “You talked about my potential.” No one has spoken to me about my potential probably for decades. And then I realized that phrase wasn’t all about me.
Think about it. When do we use the word “potential”? We use it with recent graduates, younger folks who receive their first award, or an aspiring artist or athlete, all with potential. That makes sense. Yet that term is rarely used with aging.
For example, if someone is accomplished, has a track record, and is older, it is easy to assume that person has topped out, that they have reached their personal pinnacle. That might be the case for some, but not for everyone. It’s when we believe that it is true for all older people, we are surrendering to stereotypical thinking.
Becca Levy, professor of social and behavioral sciences at the Yale School of Public Health, makes the point in the Journal of Geriatrics. The title of her article is “Improvement in later life is not rare; it’s common, and it should be included in our understanding of the aging process.”
We know aging is often described as a steady downward trajectory to physical and mental decline. And indeed, that occurs at some point for many of us. But there is an alternative narrative. Levy’s findings and message are that older individuals can and do improve.
In the Longitudinal Health and Retirement Study of more than 11,000 participants, Levy found nearly half of adults aged 65 and older showed measurable improvement in cognitive function, physical function, or both over time.
She also found that when looking at averages, those gains disappear. “But when you look at individual trajectories, you uncover a very different story. A meaningful percentage of the older participants that we studied got better,” she wrote.
Note that one’s mindset toward aging also plays a major part in that improvement. According to her research, those with a positive attitude towards aging live 7.5 years longer than those who do not. That’s a lot of potential.
Discussing the subject with an older person who is suffering from chronic pain, is worried about paying for health care or medications, and is exhausted from caregiving is untimely to say the least. However, the message is that we all have that capacity which we can tap when the time is right. Potential is not just about money, position, or awards. It is also about deepening relationships, spiritual connection, being a better friend, and more.
We know older adults can learn new skills and that their creativity and accomplishments often continue in the later years. Many go back to school, work, start new businesses, volunteer, and more. Facts validate these accomplishments. But having the facts may not always affect our personal beliefs and actions.
So dear readers, don’t underestimate yourself or have anyone underestimate you. As Levy writes, continuous decline is not inevitable.
Stay well, everyone, and know we all have the potential … to be just a little bit kinder.
Helen Dennis is a nationally recognized leader on issues of aging and the new retirement with academic, corporate, and nonprofit experience. Contact Helen with your questions and comments at Helendenn@gmail.com. Visit Helen at HelenMdennis.com and follow her on facebook.com/SuccessfulAgingCommunity.