DEAR HARRIETTE: My daughter, a high school junior, recently broke her leg, and it has turned our whole household upside down.
She is a dedicated volleyball player and has been training nonstop for years. This was supposed to be her big season when college coaches would get to see her play and potentially recruit her. Unfortunately, she’s now missing out on the entire season, and she feels like all her hard work has gone to waste.
She is heartbroken, and honestly, I don’t know how to help her. She spends hours scrolling through social media, watching her teammates play, and it makes her feel worse.
I keep reminding her that she still has her senior year and that there are other ways to get noticed, but she doesn’t want to hear it right now.
It’s hard to watch her go from being such a motivated, confident young woman to feeling discouraged and left behind. As a parent, I want to support her emotionally and help her find perspective, but I also don’t want to dismiss her feelings.
This is a huge loss for her, and I know she’s grieving not just the injury but the lost opportunity. How can I comfort her during this difficult time while also keeping her spirits up and reminding her that this setback doesn’t have to end her dreams of playing in college?
— Turning Point
DEAR TURNING POINT: Find out if her school has a sports guidance counselor who can talk to her and help her work through her feelings. Now is a time when a professional can be extremely helpful.
Also, speak to the coach and an academic adviser about the option of reclassing, which is the process of extending her high school tenure by a year so that she can still be a junior next year during the recruitment process. This may provide some relief because it could give her a second chance to get noticed during her junior year.
DEAR HARRIETTE: I lost quite a bit of weight over the past year, and I am proud of myself.
I mainly made up my mind that I had to do it, and then I stopped eating as much and began to move more. I did not take any of the drugs that are so popular right now, though I don’t have anything against people who do.
My issue is that when people notice my weight loss, they often look me up and down and ask if I take Ozempic or Mounjaro or another of those drugs. I find myself defending my own process and sometimes being judged because I didn’t use one of them.
How can I get people to back off? It doesn’t matter how I lost the weight if it’s a good thing for me, right?
— Trimmed Down
DEAR TRIMMED DOWN: People are curious about the new drugs you mentioned in the category known as GLP-1 agonists. For some time, people were skeptical about them, but now it seems as though they are welcomed with open arms.
Curiosity is fueling the questions you are getting. Just brush them off.
Thank the person asking for noticing your weight loss. Tell them whatever part of your journey you want to reveal, and keep it moving. You are taking care of yourself, and that is fantastic!
Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions toaskharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.