England may have reached the World Cup semi-finals, but one American pundit reckons they’re playing so badly that they don’t deserve to be there.
Thomas Tuchel’s side beat Norway 2-1 after extra time on Saturday night in Miami, with Jude Bellingham scoring twice to turn the tie around and book England’s place in the last four.
Bellingham hauled England level just before half-time after they had fallen behind before striking again three minutes into extra time with the decisive goal.
England are now just two wins away from lifting the World Cup for the first time since 1966. Not that everyone watching was convinced by the performances that got them there, though…
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Former player and CBS Sports pundit Mike Grella delivered one of the tournament’s more memorable and scathing verdicts on the Three Lions after the final whistle.
He said: ‘The good news is you have two games left, semi-final and final, and you can actually win a World Cup for the first time since 1966. The bad news is you’re not very good at football.’
He then reached for a comparison England fans probably won’t be printing on T-shirts any time soon, adding: ‘It’s like having the world’s ugliest daughter and saying, “You’re beautiful, baby”.’
Grella argued that England were fortunate to escape with victory despite a really rather unconvincing performance.
‘You’re not good with the ball, you’re not good at transitions, you leave unbelievable spaces in between the lines.
‘By English standards, it was a really poor performance. The impressive part is how poor you are and you’re able to get away with the win.’
Tuchel wasn’t quite so ruthless, but the England manager admitted afterwards that he was far from satisfied with what he had watched.
‘We made life very difficult for ourselves today. The result is amazing. But not happy with the performance,’ he said.
The German pointed to England’s technical mistakes and believed the players lacked the speed needed to control the match.
‘Sloppy, a lot of technical mistakes, not fast enough, not repetitive enough. We were lucky today,’ the former PSG and Chelsea boss complained after the game.
Even so, Tuchel made clear he had no complaints about his players’ determination to grind out a result.
‘No one suggests that I’m not impressed with the shift that they put in, the effort, the spirit, the belief,’ he said.
‘To overcome adversity and to dig in and to find ways to win is on the absolutely highest level. They cannot get enough praise for that. But I’m also a football coach and I think we can play better.’
He insisted his criticism came from wanting England to reach a higher level rather than disappointment with the players’ attitude.
‘There’s no doubt I’m proud, and I’m happy and I feel so connected to this team because they just do whatever it takes,’ Tuchel added.
‘They just refuse to lose. They overcome obstacles and adversity. But I also have demands. We want to bring out the best in us. In my head I am just not fully satisfied and I stand by that. I think we can play faster, we can play more clinical.’