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What if your child didn’t have to choose between challenge and care?
At Kirby School, they don’t.
This intentionally small, independent school for grades 6–12 in Santa Cruz is quietly redefining what a rigorous education looks like. The difference? Kirby leads with belief.
The school’s core stance—Unconditional Positive Regard—means every student is seen, supported, and stretched. Not when they earn it. From the start.
That belief shapes everything: how teachers interact with students in the hallways, how policies balance accountability with flexibility, and how learning environments foster both courage and care.
The Power of Starting With Trust
Most schools talk about high expectations. Fewer talk about what comes before that: the student’s sense of belonging. At Kirby, belonging isn’t an afterthought, it’s the foundation. Unconditional Positive Regard (UPR), first articulated by psychologist Carl Rogers, is simple but radical: students are worthy of positive regard no matter what. They are not problems to be solved or empty vessels to be filled. They are full human beings, capable of growth and worthy of respect, even on days when they’re hardest to reach.
Critics might assume that starting with unconditional positive regard lowers the bar. In fact, Kirby teachers find the opposite. When students know their worth isn’t tied to perfection, they are more likely to take intellectual risks, ask hard questions, and push themselves through difficulty.
At Kirby, “challenge with care” isn’t a slogan. It’s daily practice.
What It Looks Like in Real Life
When a student arrived with a history of disengagement, Kirby saw more than the behaviors. One 10th grader who once tagged his name around campus in pencil—a way of saying “notice me”—was encouraged to turn that impulse into art. By senior year, he had designed and painted a mural that now covers a prominent wall on campus, inspiring students who come after him.
Another student, a high-achieving athlete, began to crumble under the strain of balancing sports and advanced classes. Instead of punishing her for missed deadlines, her teachers listened, adjusted, and reminded her that her wellbeing mattered as much as her achievements. That flexibility didn’t weaken her drive, it sustained it. She graduated as salutatorian, thriving both in athletics and the arts.
And then there are the everyday moments: a teacher who stays after class to talk through a problem set, an advisor who notices a shift in a student’s mood, a coach who celebrates not just wins but effort. These are the practices that show students they are both challenged and cherished.
Why It Matters Now
Today’s students are navigating more than academics. Rates of anxiety, stress, and burnout are at historic highs, especially in high-achieving schools. At the same time, the world beyond school demands skills that can’t be measured by a test score: critical thinking, adaptability, resilience, and the ability to navigate complexity.
Industrialized, test-driven education too often molds conformity. Kirby offers something different: a place where young people are encouraged to become their fullest selves. Here, mistakes aren’t final—they’re formative. Revision is expected. Curiosity is rewarded. And students learn that courage and care can live side by side.
The Developmental Impact
Graduates of Kirby attend a wide range of colleges—from community colleges to the nation’s most selective universities. But more important than where they go is who they become.
They leave with clarity, confidence, and a strong sense of who they are. They know how to listen with respect, speak with purpose, and act with integrity. They carry forward the knowledge that they are not defined by performance alone—but by growth, resilience, and contribution.
As the school puts it: Kirby is more than a school. It’s a place to become.
An Invitation to Families If you’re looking for a school where your child will be known not just by name, but by heart, Kirby might be your place.
See for Yourself: Schedule a Visit
About Kirby School
Founded in 1994, Kirby School is a college-preparatory, independent school in Santa Cruz, serving grades 6–12. With intentionally small class sizes and close student–teacher relationships, Kirby fosters curiosity, risk-taking, and resilience. Our graduates leave not only well-prepared for college, but equipped with the habits of mind and heart to contribute meaningfully to the world.