Q: My daughter is 15. A boy at school attacked her; it was unprovoked. She is physically hurt, needed medical attention and psychologically, it has caused her noticeable harm. She is not sleeping well, she is not herself. The kid who did this is 17 and is pleading guilty. If I got the chance to smash him in the face or rough him up, are you telling me doing so would be breaking the law?
S.S., Santa Clarita
A: You are not allowed to take the law into your own hands. We have a legal system that addresses crimes against others. Your reaction, your anger, are understandable, perhaps to put it mildly, but if you attack the offender, you not only could harm the case against him, but you also may may place yourself in jeopardy of criminal and/or civil charges, and depending upon how things play out, someone else could even get hurt.
Among the steps you can properly take are to effectuate a citizen’s arrest, and, if justified, engage in self-defense, or the actual justified defense of another. In addition, in the criminal case against the offender, you may assist with a victim’s impact statement, ask to address the court and, of course, support your daughter. A civil case also may be filed — damages and remedies such as a restraining order — could be sought there. In fact, the civil case might not be against the minor only, but his parents as well.
If you find yourself so impacted by this disturbing situation, it might be sensible to get some help dealing with it from a qualified professional. As noted, taking the law into your own hands is unlawful.
Q: Just when am I allowed to seek a restraining order against harassment?
G.B., Long Beach
A: Harassment in California involves a pattern of behavior that seeks to threaten, annoy or harm someone else. It runs the gamut from stalking to online bullying to unwanted communications to causing emotional or physical injury to another. If you are repeatedly subject to this kind of behavior, to the extent it disrupts your life, creates fear and/or stress for you and/or actually impinges on your safety, you have a basis to take legal action to protect yourself.
There are different kinds of a protective order. An emergency order comes into focus when there is immediate danger to the victim, and could be requested by law enforcement on your behalf, providing at least temporary protection. If instead you believe protection is warranted, but you do not face immediate danger, you can file for a temporary restraining order, which typically in time could lead to a hearing to make that order more permanent (or at least prolong it). The final kind of a protective order is indeed a prolonged order of restraint, which can have a duration of up to five years. Your burden is to provide evidence of a convincing case.
Court self-help
Here is a helpful link online published by the California Courts on seeking an harassment restraining order: selfhelp.courts.ca.gov/CH-restraining-order.
Ron Sokol has been a practicing attorney for more than 40 years, and has also served many times as a judge pro tem, mediator, and arbitrator. It is important to keep in mind that this column presents a summary of the law, and is not to be treated or considered legal advice, let alone a substitute for actual consultation with a qualified professional.