Prince William has spent the past five days furiously briefing everyone that he is an “emerging statesman” and world-class diplomat following his appearance in Normandy last week. The man barely managed to avoid tripping over his d-ck and he’s begging for all of the gold stars now. What’s particularly amazing is that this new “Huevo is a for-real global statesman” campaign comes after he’s had one of the worst years of his life when it comes to his image and credibility. His wife has disappeared, his office has been caught up in several major lies, the international media publicly blasted William’s lack of credibility and he’s repeatedly stepped out to public events looking and acting drunk. It also doesn’t help that William has all of the subtlety of a bull in a china shop. Behold, the latest keen statesman garbage.
The British monarchy is in good hands as Prince William has stepped into a more senior leadership role while his wife and father are being treated for cancer, a royal expert has told Newsweek. Since his accession to the title of Prince of Wales in September 2022, William has stepped into a more prominent role within the monarchy and British life, something Richard Fitzwilliams, a royal commentator, told Newsweek was a natural progression for him as an emerging statesman.
“William has long been regarded as the perfect diplomat,” Fitzwilliams said. “It was he who was chosen as the first royal to pay an official visit to Israel and the Occupied Palestinian Territories in 2018, which he carried out superbly. Last year he made a surprise visit to British troops on the border with Ukraine. He also made a plea for a permanent peace in Gaza in February.”
“He is a fine public speaker,” Fitzwilliams continued. “His address on Juno Beach, at the official Canadian celebrations of the 80th anniversary of D-Day, was superb. At the international ceremony on Omaha Beach, where he represented his father, King Charles, who is undergoing cancer treatment, it was a significant moment for him, being alongside 24 world leaders.”
“He is used to lobbying at the top,” Fitzwilliams said. “Whether it is President Xi about the illegal ivory trade or President Biden when in the United States for the Earthshot Prize Awards Ceremony. He and Catherine are the future of the monarchy. It must be a very difficult time for him whilst she fights serious illness, but it is in good hands with him as the future king,” the royal commentator continued.
He thinks he can just make these pronouncements to reporters, the reporters will dutifully parrot his talking points and everyone will be like “yes, this checks out!” William has NEVER been regarded as “the perfect diplomat,” nor is he currently regarded as an emerging statesman. He’s almost 42 years old and he’s scared of doing royal tours because he’s incapable of behaving like anything other than a racist and a colonizer. His father has never trusted him to carry out international work or diplomacy, for good reason – William is at best a gaffe-machine and at worst, one of the dumbest royals ever.
Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Cover Images, Instar.