We’re coming up on the 25th anniversary of John F. Kennedy and Carolyn Bessette Kennedy’s deaths on July 16th. People Magazine already had exclusive excerpts from a book about Carolyn published this year, Once Upon a Time: The Captivating Life of Carolyn Bessette-Kennedy. Now Us Weekly has published more excerpts and additional stories in this week’s cover story. The main focus of Once Upon a Time was that Carolyn wasn’t some villain, nor was it her fault that the marriage had ups and downs, nor was it her fault that the flight was delayed. I don’t know the truth of their situation, but like everyone else, I do find John and Carolyn fascinating. Some highlights from Us Weekly’s cover story:
John & Carolyn were solid in the last year of their lives: Despite reports the pair — who wed in 1996 — were headed for a split prior to their untimely deaths, new revelations tell a different, more nuanced story of their complicated, passionate and enduring relationship. They were in therapy together and were talking about starting a family. “Toward the end of their lives, they had managed to reach this kind of rapprochement,” The Day John Died author Christopher Andersen shares in the latest issue of Us Weekly. “Whatever friction was there was being dealt with.”
The early days: According to Beller, the couple spent the early days of their romance going on dinner dates, traveling to Kennedy’s Long Island summer rental and hanging out in Central Park, playing touch football with Kennedy’s pals from Brown. “[Carolyn] would stay on the sidelines with John’s German shepherd Sam … calling plays, and teasing everyone mercilessly, laughing. John loved it,” Kennedy’s college friend Richard Wiese said in Once Upon a Time.
Carolyn played hard to get? Andersen says Bessette was “very cool, very smart [and] very intoxicating.” Historian Steve Gillon, who wrote America’s Reluctant Prince: The Life of John F. Kennedy Jr. and was a former good friend of Kennedy’s, adds that she “could challenge him intellectually. Carolyn found him, and then she made him work for her. I think that’s one of the reasons he was smitten.” Kennedy — considered to be one of the world’s most sought-after bachelors — proposed on July 4, 1995; Bessette reportedly made him wait three weeks before she said yes. They tied the knot in an intimate ceremony in front of just 40 guests at a small church on Cumberland Island in Georgia.
Reclusive Carolyn: Their marriage was marked by highs and lows. “There were a lot of issues,” says Gillon. Bessette hated being thrust into the spotlight and hounded by the paparazzi, and she resented Kennedy for it. “John had grown up with this media presence his whole life; it didn’t bother him,” explains Gillon. “But Carolyn was terrified. She became more reclusive.” They fought, sometimes publicly. (Photos of them arguing at NYC’s Washington Square Park made front-page news in 1996.) “They were both very high-strung, and I think they had tempers,” says Andersen. (Gillon recalls a fight the pair had in the kitchen of their Tribeca loft over a letter Kennedy received from his boss at his political magazine, George, during which Bessette “lit into” Kennedy for not sticking up for himself more.) “We saw several arguments they had in public,” adds Andersen, “but by and large, people thought Carolyn was worth it.”
They were discussing having kids in their last months. “[John] even had a name picked out,” says Andersen. “[Whether] it was a boy or a girl, they were going to call the child Flynn.” Bessette was coming around after having reservations about bringing a baby into the mix with all of the media attention they garnered. “She was doing much better in the closing weeks of their marriage,” Andersen says. “John was making accommodations for Carolyn and she was finally making them for him.”
Things were looking up. “Carolyn had found a way to cope with all of the attention,” says Andersen. “They had found a way.” Kennedy (who’d finally decided to follow his father’s footsteps into politics — “that was his calling,” says Gillon) was feeling hopeful, Andersen adds. “Days before he died, John said, ‘I’m happy with where my life is now.’”
I’m kind of wary of either extreme when it comes to stories about the last months of their lives. They were having well-documented issues and they had likely separated, however temporarily. But they were working on their marriage and it was actually a “good sign” that Carolyn wanted to go with John to a Kennedy family wedding that weekend. It does feel like there’s a movement to approach John or Carolyn as a sainted “great white hope” figure, when really, they were both messy people.
Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Cover Images. Cover courtesy of Us Weekly.