Katherine Ryan has revealed she suffered a miscarriage last year, and heartbreakingly feared it was her own fault.
The comedian, 41, has been open about pregnancy loss and fertility issues in the past, as well as her desire to expand her family.
Katherine is mum to teenager Violet who she shares with her ex, as well as two young children, Fred, three, and Fenna, one, with Bobby Kootstra, with whom she entered a civil partnership in 2019.
Late last year, the star revealed she had suffered ‘three miscarriages in five years’ and discussed medical emergencies happening while she was on tour working around Europe as well as the risk of miscarriage increasing as she gets older.
She’s now opened up about pregnancy loss she faced in September during a tour, saying it was ‘difficult’ at times.
Speaking on her Telling Everybody Everything podcast, Katherine said: ‘We lost another pregnancy in September at the beginning of the tour, which was fine, and then it was difficult, and then it became fine again.
‘I’m totally fine about it now. And not to be shrewd, but I looked in the calendar and I thought, oh, we would be due to have that baby in March, and I thought, that’s fine, I can do the Irish dates of my tour and land and I have a few specific dates off, I can make sure I have the baby on this specific day and then do the London dates of the Palladium with a small baby.’
She continued: ‘I thought yeah, fine. Absolutely not fine, absolutely not. Can I imagine having a one-month-old baby right now? Obviously, I don’t want any pregnancy to end prematurely, that’s not how you enter these things.
‘But it was a surprise. And I thought the timing is pretty bad, but not that bad. That was terrible timing and now I feel it really would not have been sustainable for this family.’
Katherine said she found out about the miscarriage at a scan, saying: ‘I never find out at home, it’s always a surprise and then I always have to have surgical intervention, meaning it does not resolve itself on its own.
‘Some of the occasions we have had the products of conception tested to find out why we had a miscarriage. This time in September, I absolutely thought it was my fault because I was on tour.’
She said she was on a lot of flights because of the tour and had heard ‘doctors specifically in Chinese medicine’ warning people not to take flights during the first trimester due to blood clotting.
Katherine added that she was on blood thinners too and had autoimmune support, which she’s had for previous pregnancies, and thought she would ‘be fine for the flights’.
The NHS states that flying while pregnant isn’t harmful to you or your baby, adding: ‘Some women prefer not to travel in the first 12 weeks of pregnancy because of nausea and vomiting and feeling very tired during these early stages. The risk of miscarriage is also higher in the first 3 months, whether you’re travelling or not.’
She went on to say that she feared her coeliac disease had also played a part, and said: ‘Because I’m coeliac and you will initiate an autoimmune response if you eat gluten when you’re coeliac, I never want to lose a pregnancy that way. I always feel like I have these autoimmune issues and they must create autoantibodies that attack healthy pregnancies, that’s what I have believed in the times that I’ve had miscarriages.’
What is coeliac disease?
The NHS states coeliac disease is a condition where your immune system attacks your own tissues when you eat gluten. This damages your gut (small intestine) so your body cannot properly take in nutrients.
Coeliac disease can cause a range of symptoms, including diarrhoea, abdominal pain and bloating.
Coeliac disease is caused by an adverse reaction to gluten, which is a dietary protein found in 3 types of cereal: wheat, barley and rye, with gluten found in any food containing those including pasta, cakes, most breads, certain sauces, and some ready meals.
There is no cure for coeliac disease, which affects 1 in every 100 people in the UK.
More information is available from charity Coeliac UK.
While in tour on Denmark she was ‘so sick with morning sickness’ and ‘so hungry’ that she unknowingly ate crisps containing yeast extract.
She continued: ‘I was like, oh my God, I ate yeast and then I started to feel a little bit sick. And then when we landed back home, I had a scan and it was at nine weeks, five days that the baby’s heart stopped beating.
‘And I was like, it is my fault and that’s why I really spiralled. I was like, I’ve done this because imagine thinking to yourself, “I’ve got this surprise pregnancy, how lovely, how much I love being a mum, it’s getting less and less likely because I’m over 40 now, and I have killed a pregnancy by eating chips”.
‘That’s a lot of pressure on someone, and I just thought, I’ve done it now, this is my fault.’
After several weeks, Katherine found out through tests that the unborn baby had Turner syndrome, which she found ‘comforting’ to know because it’s a ‘totally random’ condition.
According to the NHS, Turner syndrome is a female-only genetic disorder that affects about 1 in every 2,000 baby girls. It means the foetus only has one normal X sex chromosome rather than two. It is random, and not linked to the mother’s age.
Katherine went on: ‘So because it was totally random, because it was a genetic condition, I all of a sudden felt this euphoria that it was not my fault.
‘Even though that’s stupid, it’s not my fault that I have an autoimmune disease but anyway, that’s what went down, and now I feel a lot of peace about it.’
Last year, Katherine said she was worried about getting pregnant again, telling OK! Magazine: ‘I’m old. I used to think I was going to be the babies’ dad because I’m working, but actually I’m like their grandmother.
‘My back hurts, sometimes I give them treats. I’m like a fun grandma.’
She admitted she’d been deterred from expanding her family after learning the shocking statistics about pregnancy.
‘We’ve always gotten pregnant with the babies quite quickly. I’ve been pregnant five times in five years, but that also means I’ve had three miscarriages in five years,’ she said.
Pregnancy loss helpline
For emotional support, you can contact Miscarriage Association’s pregnancy loss helpline on 01924 200799 or email info@miscarriageassociation.org.uk.
‘You have to find a balance between what you can personally stand and risks you’re willing to take.’
She also ruled surrogacy out as an option, a route which many celebrities including Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton have taken.
Katherine said: ‘It’s controversial to say, but I wouldn’t want that labour – both literal and also the workload – to fall on another woman.’
While noting that surrogacy is ‘wonderful’ and praising people who wish to offer it for couples ‘who need it’, it would feel ‘exploitative’ for her.
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