Matt Bomer Recalls How Coming Out as Gay Was ‘Stolen’ From Him by Tabloid …
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Matt Bomer is a beloved, profoundly handsome actor.
Whether you know him from White Collar or Magic Mike or Doom Patrol or Fellow Travelers or Mid-Century Modern, his dazzling smile is now a familiar sight.
That was not always the case. Bomer was not always famous. And while he never truly hid who he is, he was not always out as gay.
In fact, there was a time when rampant speculation about his sexuality cost him jobs — and robbed him of the opportunity to come out on his own terms.
Matt Bomer attends the 84th Annual Peabody Awards at Beverly Wilshire, A Four Seasons Hotel on June 09, 2024. (Photo Credit: Kevin Winter/Getty Images)
Matt Bomer had his coming out ‘stolen’ from him
During this week’s episode of the Dinner’s On Me podcast with Jesse Tyler Ferguson, Matt Bomer recalled losing out on his chance to come out.
He did come out as gay in 2012, giving his family a shoutout while receiving his Steve Chase Humanitarian Award.
However, Bomer keenly recalls the time “when folks could kind of take over your own personal narrative before you even had a chance to.”
Matt Bomer attends the Los Angeles premiere of Hulu’s new series “Mid-Century Modern” at DGA Theater Complex on March 25, 2025. (Photo Credit: Amy Sussman/Getty Images)
Bomer even specified “outlets like Perez Hilton.”
He observed that these outlets seemed to relish in “talking about my personal life before I had ever had a chance to even do it myself.”
Bomer continued:
“And it wasn’t because I didn’t want to; I didn’t even have an opportunity to.”
Matt Bomer speaks onstage during Hulu’s “Mid-Century Modern” In Conversation at 92NY on March 27, 2025. (Photo Credit: Dia Dipasupil/Getty Images)
The rampant speculation cost him jobs
Matt Bomer has previously shared that the rampant speculation on his sexuality ahead of him coming out cost him jobs.
One of which was the role of Superman. Obviously, that could have been huge for his career.
(Notably, this was not the same iteration of the caped crusader whom Henry Cavill portrayed. The Bomer film would have been directed by the now-disgraced Brett Ratner, so one could argue that Bomer dodged a bullet)
Matt Bomer attends the 30th Annual Critics Choice Awards at Barker Hangar on February 07, 2025. (Photo Credit: Frazer Harrison/Getty Images)
Bomer also recalled out these tabloids seemed happy to print rumors about his sexuality — but never seemed to invite him to tell his own story.
“I just didn’t have a career that warranted that,” he then admitted.
“And so it felt kind of unfair to me,” Bomer expressed. “That that was stolen by people who did have a microphone at the time.”
Matt Bomer attends the 2025 Vanity Fair Oscar Party Hosted By Radhika Jones at Wallis Annenberg Center for the Performing Arts on March 02, 2025. (Photo Credit: Amy Sussman/Getty Images)
No one should ‘have’ to come out, and coming out should always be a personal choice
“It was a weird time,” Bomer characterized, noting how he did not actually hide his sexuality.
“Even when we were walking around in the streets, you know, there’d be pictures of Simon and our kids and I,” he recalled.
What mattered, Bomer explained, was that he didn’t want his family “to feel like they were some kind of shameful secret. Or something I was sweeping under the rug so I could have a great career.”
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