Dear Eric: We live in a suburban neighborhood where the homes are fairly close together. We have a very nice screened-in porch and a large deck that we added two years ago. Typically fall is our favorite time of year to be outside on our deck, and we like to eat breakfast and dinner on our porch.
Our next-door neighbors are heavy pot smokers and the smell from the pot is so strong and offensive to us that we are no longer able to use the outside areas we used to love to use.
They have lived here for about two years and, while they are somewhat friendly, they are not especially approachable. We smelled the pot last fall, but they only smoked occasionally so it was not a problem.
For some reason, their pot smoking has significantly increased this year to the point that of the five or six times a day that my husband or I walk outside our house, the smell is unbearable.
I certainly understand that it is their right to smoke on their property and I don’t care if they choose to smoke pot. I just don’t want to smell it. I have considered talking to the pot smokers, but I don’t know them well and have no sense of how they will react.
— Smoked Out
Dear Smoked Out: Part of being a good neighbor is having an awareness of how one’s way of living affects everyone else. So, letting your neighbors know that you can smell their pot, and you’d rather not is a good start. And it’s the only way of finding out how they’ll react. They may not realize that the smell is carrying, or that it bothers you.
Hopefully, they’ll make changes to solve the issue so everyone can happily coexist. If they don’t, however, you might want to invest in a porch fan to help clear the air. Fans that are charged by solar panels are great options, as they can blow constantly without running up your electric bill.
Dear Eric: I have an issue with a neighbor who is “wilding” her yard, letting all the plants grow as they will, and, unfortunately, they are invading my yard. A nasty vine called Porcelain Berry has grown up into one of my trees, and strangled four limbs, so far, and pulled them down.
I have seen rats in her yard, so I have four traps re-baited quarterly. Every time I try to take back my section of the yard, she runs out of her house and screams at me. I reported her yard to the city, but with no results.
She is in her late 60s, early 70s, widowed and childless. I am 76 and also live alone, but I have three kids, who check on me often, and are just as bothered as I am. I have heart issues and can’t do a great deal of continuous yard work. I plan to have my lawn crew mow down the strip of encroachment, pull down the vines coming from her yard, hack back the bush the vines are coming from, and possibly, build a short wall on our shared border. However, my worry is the tree. It is the only tree I have that shades my house on that side.
— Growing Problem
Dear Growing: As with today’s other letter, being a good neighbor involves awareness of one’s own impact. It seems your neighbor struggles with that.
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Porcelain Berry is an invasive species that is very hard to control once established, so your proactivity is a good idea. Some states even have specific pages dedicated to controlling and removing the vine. You may want to search your state’s Department of Agriculture website for help.
Talk to your lawn crew about your specific concerns regarding the tree and see if this is something they can handle. Per Trees Atlanta, an organization dedicated to planting, conserving and educating the public about trees, one method for removing Porcelain Berry is to unwind them carefully from the branches and trunk, with gloves and clippers. Once the vine is unwound, they recommend cutting the vine at the base, which will kill the vines that are beyond reach. They recommend not trying to pull down vines that are above you. If this is beyond the lawn crew’s skill set, you’ll want to reach out to an arborist or another skilled professional who can tackle the problem.
Try writing your neighbor a note letting her know about the wall and the other landscaping plans. It seems likely that talking won’t get you anywhere, based on past experiences, but at least a note potentially staves off a confrontation on the day of. Also, you may want to ask one of your kids to be on-site that day to help support you.
(Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at eric@askingeric.com or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.)