Almost three decades on, the murderer who killed my little girl will be released soon (Picture: North News & Pictures Ltd)
I smiled as I watched my three grandchildren excitedly open their presents from Santa.
It was just before 11am on Christmas Day in 1997 and I was at the house of my son, Michael – then the phone rang. Picking it up, my son’s face dropped and all the colour drained from it.
‘It’s Dad,’ he turned and said to me, before passing over the phone.
Then came the words I’ll never forget: ‘The police think Joanne’s been murdered.’
My daughter, Joanne, was just 29 years old.
I immediately went ballistic and started screaming. The poor grandkids – all of whom were under 10 – didn’t know what was wrong with Granny so they were ushered away.
That was the day my life changed forever – but now, almost three decades on, the murderer who killed my little girl will be released soon. I’m doing everything in my power to stop that from happening.
Joanne was always so happy, caring and quick to see the good in people. She’d be constantly on the phone wanting to chat, even though she lived just 15 minutes away from me in Throckley, near Newcastle.
Joanne was always so happy, caring and quick to see the good in people (Picture: ncjMedia Ltd)
She spent the first half of Christmas Eve in 1997 at her flat with her cat. Then her father was due to pick her up and drive her to his home in Stamfordham, Northumberland, so that she could go out with her friends at the pub that evening.
My husband, Wayne – Joanne’s step-dad – and I actually called her to persuade her to spend Christmas Day with us, but she was determined to spend it with her dad and friends.
After I hung up the phone, I had no idea it would be the last time I ever spoke to her. What happened next is what I later found out from the police.
Joanne was preparing to go to bed – she even had water in the bathroom sink (Picture: North News & Pictures Ltd)
Joanne had never met 23-year-old Steven Ling until that evening in a Stamfordham pub when she was out with her friends. They all left around 1am and he tagged on to the group to walk down the village to their respective homes. He was intoxicated.
Joanne made it back to her dad’s flat alone and was preparing to go to bed – she even had water in the bathroom sink, her jewellery on the windowsill, and her coat was laid on her bed.
Steven Ling then came back and somehow persuaded her to go to his house as he said he was having a party. But when she got to his house, there was no one else there.
When my son got that call on Christmas Day, my world fell apart (Picture: North News & Pictures Ltd)
He started kissing Joanne and she tried to get away, so then he punched her and later raped her. Either during or immediately afterwards, he stabbed her with a kitchen knife and attempted to suffocate her with a pillow and duvet.
Horrifyingly, the knife he used broke, so he obtained a second one to continue the attack. A pathologist revealed that Joanne had sustained a total of 60 injuries – 31 of which were knife wounds, including an attempted cross or swastika in her skin.
This Is Not Right
On November 25, 2024 Metro launched This Is Not Right, a year-long campaign to address the relentless epidemic of violence against women.
Throughout the year we will be bringing you stories that shine a light on the sheer scale of the epidemic.
With the help of our partners at Women’s Aid, This Is Not Right aims to engage and empower our readers on the issue of violence against women.
You can find more articles here, and if you want to share your story with us, you can send us an email at vaw@metro.co.uk.
Read more:
Introducing This Is Not Right: Metro’s year-long violence against women campaign
Yvette Cooper’s message to abusers and rapists: The streets don’t belong to you
Remembering the women killed by men in 2024
Stories about violence against women don’t make an impact – this is why
Steven Ling then got into his car and was arrested later that night for driving under the influence of alcohol. He then admitted to killing Joanne.
I knew none of this at the time, so when my son got that call on Christmas Day, my world fell apart. Then we were asked to drive to Hexham to identify the body, which was just awful.
Due to the extent of her heinous injuries, her body was swaddled so we only saw her face with her eyes wide open. I recall blood dripping from her mouth and she just looked so angry.
The rest of the day was a blur. It was the worst thing that could have ever happened.
The grief never goes away (Picture: North News & Pictures Ltd)
It was February when police relayed the full details of what happened to Joanne – including the fact that she had cuts to her hands where she tried to defend herself, her pubic hair was partially shaved and there was a cigarette shoved inside of her.
A psychiatric report later concluded it was a ‘picqueristic style’ attack, which refers to a sexual interest in penetrating the skin of another person with sharp objects.
The details are dreadful. I was screaming, shouting, and I couldn’t believe someone would do that to my little girl.
Ever since Joanne’s death, I’ve been outspoken in the media and followed the case very closely (Picture: North News & Pictures Ltd)
Nevertheless, I decided very early on that I wanted to be kept up to date with everything, so I was very involved with helping the police put the case against the perpetrator together.
I was in the courtroom throughout Steven Ling’s trial – including when he pleaded guilty to murder. But even though he admitted rape, the charge was left to lie on file (meaning he has not been classed as a sex offender).
He received a mandatory life sentence, with Mr Justice Potts telling him: ‘You will never be released so long as it is thought you constitute a danger to women.’
I couldn’t have been more relieved because I had some justice for my little girl, yet it didn’t sit right with me about the rape charge.
Learn more about femicide
On average, one woman a week is killed by a partner/ex-partner.
Of the 249 female domestic homicide victims between March 2020 and March 2022, the suspect was male in a staggering 241 cases.
Women’s Aid have found that women are over three times more likely to be killed by a partner than by not wearing a seatbelt
A Killed Women survey found that only 4% of bereaved family members said their loved one’s killing was not preventable at all
And Femicide Census found that 53% of the perpetrators of femicide in 2020 had a history of violence to women
The grief never goes away and I needed a lot of medication that first year after Joanne’s death. It knocked me for six so I couldn’t eat or sleep.
Ever since Joanne’s death, I’ve been outspoken in the media and followed the case very closely, including the five parole board reviews he’s had to decide if he should be released.
I was shocked to find out that during his reviews in 2020 and 2022, it was recommended to the Secretary of State for Justice that he be moved to open conditions (a lower level security prison).
Thankfully, this was rejected and I was happy about that, but everything changed on September 9 this year.
Every year since Joanne’s death, I can’t deal with the festive hype in the lead up to Christmas (Picture: North News & Pictures Ltd)
I was actually on holiday in Lanzarote when we were informed of the Parole Board’s decision to release Steven Ling into the community. I was in shock and immediately felt disgusted by the news.
My phone started blowing up with calls and messages from journalists asking what I thought about the news.
It came about after a public parole hearing in July, where two psychologists gave evidence recommending Steven Ling’s release from prison. The parole board then concluded that ‘imprisonment was no longer necessary for the protection of the public’ because his conduct in prison has ‘largely been exemplary’.
What to do if you’ve been raped
If you have been the victim of rape, either recently or historically, and are looking for help, support is out there.
If you have recently been raped and you are still at risk, ring 999 and ask for the police. Otherwise, the first step is to go somewhere you are safe.
If you want to report your rape to the police, ring 999 or the police non-emergency line on 101. An Independent Sexual Violence Advocate (ISVA) will often be on hand to help you through reporting and even after you have made a statement, you can still decide to withdraw from the criminal justice process at any time.
If you plan on going to the police, if possible, do not wash your clothes or shower, bathe or brush your teeth. If you do get changed, keep the clothes you were wearing in a plastic bag. These steps will help to preserve any DNA evidence your attacker may have left on your body or clothes.
If you don’t want to contact the police, Rape Crisis suggest talking to someone you trust about what has happened; or you can ring one of the UK’s many rape and sexual assault helplines.
Anyone aged 16+ can contact Rape Crisis’s 24/7 Support Line by calling 0808 500 2222 or starting an online chat.
If you have been injured, you’re best advised to go to your nearest A&E to seek medical treatment. If you are uninjured, you can go to your nearest Sexual Assault Referral Centre (SARC). The NHS has information on where to find your nearest centre here.
If your rape is historic, you can still access support, including from the police – there is no time limit on reporting and your account can still be used as evidence.
Read more here.
As Joanne’s mother, I feel I’m letting her down if I’m not there with her on Christmas Eve (Picture: North News & Pictures Ltd)
Then on October 22, the parole board refused the Lord Chancellor’s request to overturn its decision – so it’s looking like he’ll be released at some point in the future. As yet, we haven’t been informed when this will be.
I think this is outrageous and it’s absolutely the wrong call.
At the end of the day, I want authorities to lock him up and throw away the key. Of course, there’ll be conditions of his release, but I don’t think they’ll be able to keep an eye on him all the time.
I’m terrified he’ll reoffend because I don’t think a person like that can change. To make matters worse, he’s not a convicted sex offender so he won’t be placed on the Sex Offenders Register, which means nobody would know they’re living next door to him.
Learn more about Killed Women
Killed Women is an organisation and network for the bereaved families of women who were killed by men, and they’re campaigning for change.
Killed Women want to change the perception that these deaths and injustices are unavoidable tragedies to be expected and accepted. They’re campaigning to:
Help protect more women from these most extreme forms of violence
Get justice for those who have lost their lives at the hands of men
Improve the support and rights of the bereaved families left behind, especially for children
If you are a bereaved relative of a woman who has been killed by a man, you can reach out to Killed Women on info@killedwomen.org. To find out more about the organisation, click here.
I am so worried for the safety of women if he gets out. He’s dangerous – and my beautiful daughter is the proof.
After 27 years, I still cannot spend a family Christmas with my son, Michael, and his family as it’s too painful. We also don’t have Christmas at all – that means no cards, presents, decorations or Christmas food.
Every year since her death, I can’t deal with the festive hype in the lead up to Christmas so Wayne and I go on holiday. But I always have to be back home by Christmas Eve to be with Joanne at her grave – as well as on Christmas Day itself.
As her mother, I feel I’m letting her down if I’m not there with her.
Steven Ling has broken our family and yet he will be released very soon into the community to take up his life again. But I believe he should be kept in prison for the rest of his life.
He is a very dangerous man. And I will never ever forgive him for taking her from us.
As told to James Besanvalle
This article was originally published December 4, 2024
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