Indianapolis Colts‘ offensive tackle Braden Smith missed the final five games of 2024 when he was placed on the non-football injury (NFI) list on December 14th. It wasn’t until later that Smith would disclose that he – like many of us – was battling mental health issues.
Specifically, Smith was dealing with a form of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) known as “religious scrupulosity.” Now, Smith is back and feeling better than he ever has.
“This is the best I’ve felt in a really long time,” Smith said after practice Monday. “I’m in a spectacular place.”
What is religious scrupulosity? The International OCD Foundation describes it as such:
“Scrupulosity is a subtype of obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) involving religious or moral obsessions. Scrupulous individuals are overly concerned that something they thought or did might be a sin or other violation of religious or moral doctrine. They may worry about what their thoughts or behavior mean about who they are as a person.”
Braden Smith re-worked his contract this offseason
Back in March, the 29-year old Smith re-worked his deal with the Colts to free up cap space. Terms of the deal weren’t available at the time, but the Indy Star did mention that his absence in 2024 was “due to a personal matter.”
General manager Chris Ballard’s comments back then make a lot more sense after knowing what Smith has been going through.
“What I will tell you is he’s doing really well, and he wants to play football,” Ballard said. “We’ll work through the rest of it.
“We’re supporting Braden. I think the world of him and he’s been a great player for us. We’ll see going forward.”
Smith told the Indy Star in the offseason that things got really, really bleak for him at one point.
“I was physically present, but I was nowhere to be found,” Smith said. “I felt like I was a month away from putting a bullet in my brain.”
The effects of religious scrupulosity can be crippling
Smith said he was obsessing over his Christian religion and it was mentally very damaging to him.
“I don’t do compulsive prayers at all anymore,” the 2018 second-round pick said. “I don’t do the replacing the good with the bad. If I have a bad thought, it’s just, like, OK, that’s one of many thoughts. I’ll just move on with my day and don’t let it affect me. I used to spend like 3 to 5 hours a day in my head, doing compulsions. It was so exhausting.
“There was only one person that was ever perfect, and that was Jesus. When you’re trying to live up to that standard, actually live that out, it’ll drive you nuts.”
The Colts are happy to have Smith in camp and in a good place.
“Braden Smith is back and he’s in a great spot,” Ballard said in April. “I think people forget how good Braden is.”
Hopefully for Smith the mental struggles are in his past. Those things can be quite tricky. It sounds like he is doing well and finally able to just focus on football.
“Now, instead of obsessing over other things,” Smith said. “I can obsess over my craft, turn a negative into a positive.”
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